BFF

"In life some will say goodbye, but believe, when one says goodbye, another one will come and say hello.."

But, what if we don't wanna say goodbye to that one? What will you feel if someone you always need, someone you depend on, your soul-mate, your best-friends tell you to call them ONLY if you feel very lonely, ONLY if you can't cope with your problem alone, ONLY if you really need someone to share nobody out there. If you're not lonely, if you still can handle your problem by yourself, if there's still someone to share, don't call them!! What do you feel? In my case, it really broke my heart..

My best friend told me that, he want me to be a stronger woman, but I think that's irrational. He doesn't have to disappear from me just to make me stronger, does he? He's the only one I need right now, he's the only one I can lean on, he's the only one who can calm me down..Heard him said that really made me down..He's not my boyfriend, he's more than that, he's my soul-mate, my irreplaceable best friend...

I just wish, that he will never leave me, I wish that he's not disappear from my life,,I need him, always need him...

What a JOB!!

I finally got a job, it's a business assistant in a private company at Sudirman..I was pretty excited about this job at the first time, but until the 4th day, my activities were just..ONLINE..yup, online,,ga ada kerjaan laen gw, ada si,,selain OL gw jg baca-baca file di kompi gw,,gw pelajarin company profile sama product profile perusahaan tempat gw kerja ini, but reading for 8 hours is such a one hell boring activity..UNTUNGNYA,,temen-temen kantor gw menyenangkan!! :D

They welcomed me well, tp di kantor ini karyawannya cuma dikit, mungkin emang ga butuh banyak kali ya...yah, walaupun boring, tapi gw jg belajar disini, belajar bikin surat (sebenernya lebih ke nyontekkin surat-surat yg udah ada), belajar bikin laporan (once again, sebenernya cuma liatin laporan yang udah ada), lumayan lah buat referensi..Paling ga, klo nanti gw apply ke better place, ada pengalaman kerja yang gw tulis di formulir lamaran kerja,,hahahaa..
Enjoying life....

Bad Mood Stadium Akhir

Hmmm..Today's suck!!
I hate Monday,,not because it's Monday and it would be a long traffic jam but because I was in a bad mood,,real bad..Nanda masih marah sama gw (we still fight over silly things, unfortunately), kemarahannya Nanda bikin mood gw drop drop drop,,dan jd ga semangat buat jalan interview (but I kept going, anyway)..Suasana hati gw bener-bener ga enak banget dari kemaren (dari sabtu malam tepatnya), I've tried almost everything to say I'm sorry to him, but nothing worked, dan yang lebih nyiksa adalah, gw yang biasanya cengeng malah sekarang sama sekali ga bisa ngeluarin air mata,,itu nyiksa banget karena dada gw jd sesak dibuatnya...
Dikarenakan mood yg terlalu oke, kacau lah test excel gw, emang sii, emang gw ga terlalu bisa excel (krn jaraaaaaaaang bgt dipake, jd lupa), tp gw udah latihan,,tetep aja hati gw ga bisa diajak kompromi,,bikin tabelnya sukses, tp entry datanya awut2an,,kacaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuu!!!
Bahkan shoes therapy didn't work!!I really need to be alone right now..huff...
Kenapa Nanda begitu susah maafin gw yah??Hhh,,Only him and God know...Yah, untuk entertain myself, I put my favorit photo of him, gw suka banget liat dia di foto ini,,klo liat foto yang ini gw bisa ga ngedip..hihi....

The Lucky Girl

"Love is like an earthquake, unpredictable and a lil' bit scary. Butwhen the hardest part is over, you'll realize how lucky you are.."

That's what I learn from Johnny Depp, well, he didn't say it to me but I found his quotation on a daily newspaper. I think what he said is true, we never know  whom we'll fall in love with, we could be in love  with stranger, we could be in love with our own best friend(never happen to me), we even could be in love with our enemy!!

The last option might be a lil' bit annoying because logically, nobody wants to fall in love with someone they hate, right?. But, once again, love is unpredictable, and in the other hand, the line between love and hate is really thin. The more you hate someone, the more also the possibility of you to love that person as much as you hate him/her.

It happened to me once. I fell in love with someone I didn't like, but he was really nice to me until I got lost..But our relationship didn't work, he was a jerk. But it's okay, I never regret it, I chose him, didn't I?

Never regret about any bad things that happen to you, because everything happens for a reason.

Oh, I also fell in love with stranger. He got my eyes at the first time I saw him, and luckily he also felt the same way..But our relationship was very difficult, there were so many problems, but one thing that I realize was, this man was the first man who fight really hard for my love, and he was always there even when I hurt him. I asked him once about did I hurt him, and he said to me, "you don't hurt me, because I love you. And love doesn't hurt." That's the sweetest thing that a man did for me. That was also the reason why I still fall in love with him until this moment, and forever (I pray)..I'm the lucky girl ;)

Uuuurrrrrrgggghhh

Today was sucks!!

Dimulai dengan tidak moodnya gw nganterin CV ke salah satu bank (sebenernya ga mau,tp dipaksa),,pake salah alamat lg, untung ga jauh..Abis itu mampir ke warnet langganan, tadinya mau ngirim lamaran via email,,tp loadingnya "cepet" bgt..eehh,,malah buka blog, yaudah deh jd gatel mau edit2,,customaze2,,dan nyobain template baru..tp didn't know how,ga bisa keganti text colournya,,jd belang2 ga karuan deeeehh,,BT..mau pulang tp ujan deres bgt diluar..iiiiyyyyhhh,,suuucckk...:(

Saat Hidup Sudah Mulai Keras

Waktu masih kuliah dulu, saya sama sahabat saya, Imas punya mimpi..Kita sering banget ngayal seandainya kita punya FASHION MAGAZINE kita sendiri.. Kita udah ngebayangin bakalan kaya apa majalah kiata nanti, kita pikirin mulai dr target pemasarannya, features & rubrik apa aja yg bakalan ada di dalem majalah kita nanti, siapa aja yg jd covernya, sampe bentuk majalah kita nanti kaya apa.. Biasanya kita berdua berkhayal sambil makan frosty di Wendy's berdua..

Sekarang kita berdua udah lulus kuliah, sebenernya mau banget wujudin mimpi itu tp kita sadar, selain we have NO skill dalam bidang permajalahan, kita jg belum punya cukup modal (boro2 modal buat majalah, buat diri sendiri aja kacrut!)..So, kita putusin untuk "menunda" mimpi itu sampai nanti kita berdua siap segala2nya..

Tapi,, sekarang ada masalah baru,,kita berdua sama2 blm dapet kerja..itu yg sekarang bener2 bikin kita berdua stress,,there's so many questions in our head, the biggest question is, WHY?

Apa kita berdua bego banget? Apa kita berdua kurang menarik? Apa kita berdua minta gaji kegedean?

Well, apapun itu, mungkin cuma satu jawaban yg bener2 pasti.."belum rezeki", begitu kata temen2 gw..

"Gw ga mau nganggur lama2", itu terus yg ada di pikiran gw..Gw mau ngangkat derajat orang tua gw, gw mau bantu orang2 yg selalu bantu gw dan keluarga gw, gw ga mau keluarga gw diremehin orang karena keseringan dibantu..Mungkin gw idealis, mungkin jg belagu,,tp gw mau dapet kerjaan dari usaha gw sendiri, bukan gara2 dicariin orang lain..Itu beban buat gw, gw harus jaga nama baik orang lain, it's a big deal for me..

Beberapa kali gw ngerasain, orang2 yg merasa sudah sering membantu keluarga gw(ga semua), mereka jd merasa punya hak untuk menentukan jalan hidup gw, kadang2 mereka jd diktator..Seolah2 gw dan orang tua gw bakal mati klo ga ada mereka..Rasanya ga enak banget, makanya gw bertekad bgt mau dpt kerjaan dr usaha gw sendiri, gw mau buktikan sama mereka, gw jg bisa tanpa mereka..

Bukannya gw ga berterima kasih, tapi bukannya klo membantu orang itu harus ikhlas yah??

Gw sebenernya sayang sama mereka2 itu, makanya gw jg mau bikin mereka bangga, walaupun bukan itu prioritas gw..Gw mau bikin orang tua gw bangga dan bahagia..karena gw tau mereka udah lama menderita, mereka jungkir balik buat bikin gw bisa kuliah smape selesai, dan gw akan pastikan klo semua usaha mereka itu ga sia-sia..

Soal mimpi gw dan Imas itu.. Gw juga akan pastikan, suatu saat pasti akan terwujud, Insya Allah..klo niat kita baik, pasti akan diberi jalan...

Hmmm..than, hahaha!!!

Hmmm..I wanna write something,,but, I just don't know what to write on..hahaha...

It's been too long since I thought to write a story on my blog,,when I thought of it, the ideas was coming into my mind easily..but,when I started to write, those brilliant stories just..vanished..Maybe it's not a good idea for me to be an author (but tha's my dream!!!), i'm just a a girl who really love to imagine about anything, but sometimes can't make good description about it...However,,I still dare to dream and dare to make my drems come true..What about you??